What is wrong with wanting to be understood?

According to me, feeling understood is more important than feeling loved. And I think it all starts from there, be it true companionship or emotional relationship that would last for lifetime! However, constantly wanting to be understood could also mean a lot of other things too.

We are too dependant

I can’t emphasise this enough. But when we become too worked up about people not understanding us, we are choosing to be dependant. Depending too much on others could only lead to obsessional behaviour. Also, being independent does not necessarily mean living alone in an apartment with a pet. It means doing what we think and feel is right, making full use of our freedom of choice. And it is absolutely the best thing in the world.

We are in the need for approval

We constantly approach people for approval. Let’s take an example. When we upload a picture (or express an opinion) on social media, some of us expect our loved ones to approve/like it no matter what. There are many reasons why we do that, but one strong obvious reason is the peer pressure. Wanting to be accepted and approved could end up becoming a dangerous addiction.

We give space for depression

Today, depression is common among people of all age groups, be it a young adult or an elder. I was someone who always expected my loved ones to understand me without giving them any chance to know me better. And depression took over my head at a crawl. I learnt 2 things from my experience, one is to let go of my expectations from people for little things, and two is to be original and speak my heart out (at least with people who genuinely care about me).

We are often disappointed

What happens if the loved ones failed to understand us? Someone who even knows the meaning of our minutely detailed expression on face. What happens then? We are only disappointed! First and foremost, it is natural for a mother to go clueless about her crying baby at times. Therefore, constantly expecting people to understand us could lead to frequent disappointments in life.

The bottom line…

Seeking people to understand us is not bad, but doing too much of it could certainly hinder our self-esteem. Sometimes, a too much of anything is not good for anyone! Hence, let us believe in ourselves, a little more. Remember, happiness comes from within. You matter, you are important.