What is it like to have ageing parents?

Parents are people who we have looked up all our lives. Some of us are eternally gratefully for their secret sacrifices, hardships, Christmas treats, Diwali sweets, delicious Eid biriyani – you name it! They introduced us into the world where there is not a lot of time for love, empathy and gratitude. Sometimes, we forget to realise that our parents are gradually ageing amidst the drama and politics happening around us. And it is already too late by the time we realise they are old and prone to potential health risks. Having to live with elderly parents requires a lot of mental strength, no kidding! Following are some feelings and emotions that I can personally relate as the youngest child to my ageing parents.

1. Having the urge to prove self-worth

There is a sudden urge to make our parents proud once and for all. Different phases of our life like graduation, first job or just adulthood makes them really happy and proud. But we still long for that big breakthrough to make our parents feel the proudest of us. The thought of not achieving sooner than never in front of them may really bother us the most. However, it pushes us to take initiatives and do something to prove our self-worth to them.

2. Hoping for parents’ better health

We may get busy with our lives and not have time to accompany them for regular hospital visits. Some of us may not be aware of our parents’ health conditions until something serious pops up. And we suddenly become religious when our parents’ health deteriorates. Also, a phone call from them may give us a mini heart attack since we overthink about it. There is nothing worse than our ageing parents’ health. Henceforth, it is the worst feeling ever.

3. Worrying about future without parents

No one can replace our parents ever, no doubt about that! But we subconsciously start worrying about the following factors.

• What would I do without them?
• Who would even love me like them?
• How will I cope up with my daily life without them?
• Why is this happening to me?

And so many other questions pop up in our heads as a result of overthinking. However, it is very common for us to feel that way. Our parents’ unconditional love, comfort, feeling of home cannot be replaced by anyone for that matter hands down. The fear of losing them can give us nightmares in the bright daylight.

4. Wanting only the best things for parents

We may see the world differently as soon as we have a reality-check on our parents’ unconditional love. What happens next is what most of us do after the realisation part. That is, we shower them with extra love and spoil them a bit with all the luxuries that we can afford. Ah, let us not forget that our sudden shower of love may confuse the parents though lol. After all, they are probably the only people who know our every move. So there is nothing wrong in going to the ends of the earth to please them with the best things in the world!

The bottom line…

All the feelings mentioned above are signs of overthinking. But I guess it is hard to control these thoughts, especially when we are too close with our ageing parents. We realise the value of feelings, people and things only when it is slipping away or has already slipped away from us. It is all in our heads. Trust me!

Let us get rid of the unwanted thoughts to focus on the brighter days ahead with our parents. We have only one life. 🙂